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Ways to tell if your movie sucks

 

  1. It contains an obligatory vomiting scene.
  2. Anyone receives a shot to the balls.
  3. A lawyer in a court room shouts "I object!" like he's coining a phrase.
  4. Two words: "Chris Kattan".
  5. Three more words: "Mario Van Peebles".
  6. The title of your film has periods separating two or more letters. D.A.R.Y.L. = S.U.C.K.S.
  7. Someone eats or drinks something and immediately belches.
  8. Characters view film or video footage of something that happened earlier in the film, and we see it from exactly the same angles as we did when we saw it the first time. Are directors too dumb to use an extra camcorder to tape a "news" sequence?
  9. At some point, a bunch of people "bond" by parading around lip-syncing to an old r&b tune from the 60's. Chris Columbus: I'm talking to you, my man.
 

 

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