Ballistic: Ecks vs. Sever
Nothing more than a couple of hours of loud action and glossy camerawork, but still fun somehow. Antonio Banderas and Lucy Liu (ahhhhh... Lucy Liu...) scowl, fight and fire weapons convincingly. Gregg Henry steals the movie in yet another great villainous turn. Martial artist/actor Ray Park is impressive but doesn't get enough fighting time. The real stars are the pyrotechnicians and the camera crews. Director "Kaos" knows how to shoot, he could be up there with the "McTiernans" and "Donners" if he gets the right scripts. All in all it's a mixed bag, but with an exciting twenty-minute sequence that plays like a good cinematic representation of the video game "Grand Theft Auto 3."
**1/2 (out of 4 stars.)

The Tuxedo
It pained me. Anyone who knows me knows what a Jackie Chan fan I am, and this is possibly his saddest film since the American version of The Protector. I have to hope in my heart that somewhere a decent cut of this thing exists, because it's certainly not in theaters this fall. Jackie has even gone on to say in interviews that even he doesn't like The Tuxedo and that the only reason he made it was so that he could work with and meet Dreamworks and Steven Spielberg. Don't blame him, though; Jackie's fun and charming as always. Blame a screenplay that creates action without interest, comedy without laughs and experience without purpose. Jackie barely gets a chance to shine. The movie has some of the worst wirework and CGI I've ever seen. The sweet-hotness of the miscast Jennifer Love Hewitt couldn't save it, the presence of James Brown couldn't save it. TV commercial director Kevin Donovan made this --he's the one to blame if Jackie's box-office figures start to fall here in the USA.
*1/2

Red Dragon
Existing only to line the pockets of the cast, crew and Dino De Laurentis, this pointless film has the good fortune of having a great first few scenes, a few quick moments of wit courtesy Anthony Hopkins, a decent last-one-minute and little else. Edward Norton can turn in a good performance as we know from Fight Club, but he's simply miscast as an "intense, brooding FBI profiler." The same goes for Ralph Fiennes, who -- given the meatier role -- hams it up like a Batman villain. Emily Watson is wonderful as always, and Mary Louise Parker gets more sympathy from a handful of scenes than Norton does in the entire film. Supporters will tell you that Red Dragon is actually more faithful to the Thomas Harris novel than Michael Mann's superior Manhunter from years ago. But director Brett Ratner robs the characters of their mystery in this new take on the same material. By showing us more, the audience cares less. It's worth a look to complete the Hopkins performance set, but will any serial killer film ever be as good as The Silence of the Lambs? Not likely.
**1/2

The Transporter
Bright, fun action stuff. Jason Statham is a credible new action presence, he'll get a lot of work off this. Shu Qi is gorgeous and getting better with her English. But, the great shot in the trailers and ads where Statham deflects a missile from a rocket launcher with a serving tray (or something) seems to have been cut from the film (awww, man!) and in a conclusion heavily borrowed from Raiders of the Lost Ark, director Corey Yuen makes a weird choice that really confuses the audience (seriously...I checked with others around me) -- imagine if at the end of E.T. all of a sudden E.T. had a mustache, I mean it's that noticeable. Tell me what you think when you see it...
**1/2 (*** on a good day.)

Secretary
I'm officially in love with Maggie Gyllenhaal. She is "Donnie Darko's sister" no more. MAN, what a performance. Hopefully she'll become a huge star and not "go Hollywood" at the same time. Imagine if Meg Ryan had more wicked playfulness and "real-heart," as opposed to "movie-fakey-heart." Spader's character is a mess; imagine his usual snide-guy performance, but this time we kind of see why he's always behaving that way -- genius. But knowing the poster and tag line tells you know possibly all you need to know about the flick, except it's less cutesy and more dark than it appears. And that's a good thing.
***

Sex With Strangers
From the creators of HBO's "Taxi Cab Confessions" comes a documentary about the lifestyle of "swinging" that makes carnival freak-show performers look normal and well-adjusted by comparison. Like watching "Jerry Springer" for almost two hours straight, the film makes you laugh at loud at how cruel and stupid men can be and wince in your chair at how self-defeating and victimized women can become. Three sets of people, three locations, some meet, some don't. All are horrible. Only one girl has any kind of sense at all, but it comes from intense self-loathing and loneliness. I've read that some viewers think the whole thing isn't real and very much faked or staged. Beats me. It seems real enough but hopefully I'm wrong. The film serves as a reminder that "wild, easy sex" doesn't mean "healthy" sex -- neither physically or mentally.
**

Ichi the Killer
Wow. If you can survive the first five minutes, then hold on. It gets much crazier, and it's an amazing thing. A triumph. I can't recommend it enough. Yes, there is great horror and rampant, graphic adult violence, but the effects come mostly from the deeper meanings. I don't want to say too much, but I will say it's intelligent, ground-breaking and hysterically funny too. Possibly the best gore-action-comedy since Evil Dead 2. (Yes, it's THAT good.) I can't give it four stars since the VCD I watched is of the "edited" version (I'm working on getting the uncut dvd on eBay) so, for now, it gets
***1/2

-Matt Goltz